"The Interview" - A Conspiracy Theory

If I were a conspiracy theorist, I would be REAL suspicious about how this Sony debacle has gone down. Let's see how it COULD have been...

Sony puts $70 million into a movie that critics say will bomb - no one will see it. What to do? They ask their gurus, and someone says it is possible to MAKE people want to see it. People are just tall kids, and the quickest way to get a kid to do something is to tell him not to, or that he cannot.

But how to do that?

Well, Sony has a guest pass to the White House, being big-time Hollywood donors, so they might ask someone there for help. It is determined that the first step is to have a reason why people CANNOT see the movie. For that they need a villain, and they have one that is built-in - the movie is about Kim Jung Un, hated by every American except Dennis Rodman and Bill De Blasio. So, we make it look like North Korea has threatened us if we show the movie, so our beloved American public will be deprived of seeing the movie.

The NSA is ordered to hack into Sony, releasing a few embarrassing emails, whereupon almost immediately the FBI says they traced it back to North Korea. The stage has been set.

News broadcasts 24/7 puts the movie into the public eye far more effectively than millions spent on PR and advertising. The public is outraged that North Korea is now dictating what movies we can see by threatening 9/11 style attacks if Sony puts the movie out. Suddenly, everyone wants to see the movie, if only to stick a finger in Kim's eye. But they can't - Sony has pulled the movie that was scheduled to open Christmas Day.

All of a sudden, just two days before Christmas, Sony announces they have become brave heroes - they will show the movie on Christmas after all! "Screw North Korea - we don't take orders from that little maggot." Americans will get to see the movie.

And Sony will make a hundred million on a movie that had been destined for the trash barrel.

Of course, that would only be a whacky conspiracy theory...

Right?